#5: Laptop theft

If you’ve been in a white person’s apartment or home you might have noticed a funny thing that looks like a cross between an PC and a large CD player. It is what we call a laptop and it is an important stuff for modern day people.

We love our laptops for a number of reasons, the first of which is the fact that it will look sophisticated and smart if you use one. In fact, it is even more popular than a mobile phone which gives a white person that all important edge in the contest to see who can score best with the opposite sex. Though this is important, it is not the real reason why people love their laptop so much.
It’s greatest appeal lies in it’s access to the internet with it’s porn sites, online banking and speed dating.

Unlike the good old computers that had a memory of a sleeping snail, laptops are like a massage by Pamela Anderson doing a private lapdance for Playboy founder Hugh Hefner! In fact there is no other item on earth that can move you so seamlessly from you bedroom, classroom in Boston, Los Angelos or Houston to an exotic spices market in India without costing you any money or producing a terrible jetlag hangover.

Many people first acquire a love for this great invention during their school years by being jealous of someone else who has a more sophisticated piece of machinery and they want one themselves so they can play in the same upper league. In fact, many people will continue to type away on their keyboards in their local parks on a Saturday afternoon.

Until someone steals their piece of equipment that has by now become an attachment to their body, a bit like a third leg for boys or super titties for girls. If you want to belong and want to be important you join this exclusive club of laptop maniacs. Instead of going to a bar for a drink with your mates and to meet, a good looking girl, you type in whatever you like on your piece of machinery and find a girl online.

The same happens with banking and other things you can do from your lazy chair that requires putting important data into your laptop. But boy oh boy are we in deep trouble when the laptop gets stolen and someone else gets access to our bank account and credit card details. With the tap of a few keys all your precious money has been flushed down someone else’s drain and hoopla, gone are our savings. There are however FIVE easy ways to protect our beloved money from getting stolen by others, and here is what we should do to protect our hard won cash against thugs……..

Once we have done that, there is one other surefire way to make sure that no one will ever steal any money from us by stealing our precious little laptop friend. And that is by never ever using the laptop to do any online banking anymore, and that is the best way, yes that might set you back to the dark ages of banking but it sure as hell beats losing thousands of dollars to thugs. And if you want to know how easy it is to have your laptop stolen, just ask the CIA, or The Military how often they loose a laptop with some very important data on it.

So if you are smart, think again about online banking. And just say, it is better to walk to the bank to a full account than to sit at home watching an empty statement……….

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1 Comment

Filed under Activities, Computer, Culture, People

One response to “#5: Laptop theft

  1. Pingback: » #5: Laptop theft Credit Card on Credit Speak: Find Info, News and More on Credit Card

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